Thank goodness my children’s care givers don’t speak English

Spring holidays were over this morning and they went out in style. When I left the house at 7:50, both kids were barely awake and both were still in their pyjamas (knowing they need to leave the house at roughly 8:10).

My kids spent last week with their father visiting their grandparents, which was pretty much a complete and total holiday for me. I had forgotten what it was like to only have to care for myself. I could take a shower without any kids telling me they want food…now, and I could go to bed at night without fear of a little voice waking me up at 3 am because she can’t find her soother in her bed (in fairness to the cute voice, it had fallen out of the bed and I didn’t find it myself until the sun was up). I got up 30 minutes later and drank my coffee sitting down; I could watch the entire set of Harry Potter movies in a single week, because I didn’t have to wait for the kids to be in bed before starting it; I was able to paint the terrace furniture without fear of having paint on child hands and therefore all over the couch, wall, beds, counters etc.

That said, I was quite glad to have their voices fill the apartment again. I was thrilled to get cuddles and kisses. In particularly I was happy to hear my daughters voice. She is learning new words and new phrases at an alarming rate and in the four days that she was gone, I felt that she grew by months.

She also insists on singing her whole life. Sometimes she sings actual songs, like the alphabet song (emenelopy), or some random French song she heard once at a play group. Sometimes she just sings her life, such as “I’m sitting on the toilet and my underwear is pink”.

Yesterday, she suddenly started singing “I’m freaky baby, yes yes” and I am pretty sure my eyes popped out of my head. Naturally she noticed this reaction, I wasn’t quick enough to control my face, so she sang it over and over again trying to get another reaction. I held it together, I didn’t react again until she started the highly inappropriate dance moves, then I burst out laughing. I managed to convince the kids I was laughing at something completely unrelated that I saw out the window; my son was most unhappy he missed seeing whatever was so funny and went on about it for like 15 minutes.

In the end, I tried to ignore it, cursed Pitbull under my breathe and thanked the heavens that my children’s care givers don’t understand English.

ASIDE: I also learned I need to pay much closer attention to all media that reach my children, radio, iPads, T.V., everything.


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