I have been told to pick my battles numerous times since being in a relationship and a few more after having children. I think it is a wise piece of advice that everyone needs to learn, particularly anyone who has to deal with me.
I am often irritable, frustrated and need to vent my stress. Outwardly this means I have a tendency to pick random and pointless fights, I argue about points that have no real bearing on my life…to the death, and become quite angry with people who don’t agree with me.
This is nothing personal against you, its just my own personality flaw that I have tried to work on, but I figure, at 34 I’ve pretty much fought against my own personality as much as I can, now its time for you to do some work.
Here’s the deal, why get mad at me for starting a fight that is unimportant, if it is by definition a fight, then one could argue you are fighting it too…acquiesce and it can all be over. I do realise that I suck you into these battles not by the merit of my arguments or the subject matter, but by the pure passion I can demonstrate on the most meaningless of topics and the illogical and convoluted reasoning I use. I know you end up in the argument not because you feel strongly about anything except the fact that I am so totally nuts, and that you are really just trying to get me to admit that I am being irrational? I know I’m irrational, or at least I will when I calm down in about 30 minutes, or a day or a week depending on how long YOU continue this battle, but trying to convince me of my own irrationality during the moment of irrationality is completely futile.
For the record, here and now, I admit that some of my reasoning is flawed and I am not always right, now its up to you to take the lead during the next stupid and pointless battle to end it. Here are some examples of what may* work (please note Hubby, you may not use these sentences now that I have written them down, you must be creative):
– “I never thought of it that way, you are right, I’m stupid”
– “The genius that is your mind never ceases to amaze me, I don’t deserve to breathe the same air as you, you are of course right”
– “You are right, and its just so obvious, I don’t know how I never noticed it before”
– “I wish everyone could be as enlightened as you…and you are right”
* I make these suggestions now, during a moment of rational thinking, but their over exaggerated-ness may just piss me off more, so best of luck with that.